Of witchcraft, demonic attacks, curses and other things we don’t talk about. 

Today we are going to talk about witchcraft, demonic attacks, things like covenants made by our ancestors, curses and such kind of stuff. Just the introduction though. 

I come from a community associated with witchcraft. And I’ve never heard anyone denying it. They don’t accept they do go to witches either anyway. Some people are pointed out as frequenting witches. Others’ wealth is associated with the underworld. Its a common topic where I come from. Normal even. And business as usual usually. 

A story is even told of a man who had troubles who went to his pastor to be prayed for. And the pastor after praying suggested to him, ” Si ukuje nikupeleke kwa mchawi wangu akushughulikie?”( let’s go to my witch who will assist you in your troubles). 

But I went to school in “civilised” worlds. There you can go to church for a whole year and never hear witchcraft being mentioned. Some people even go to the extent of believing that those things don’t exist anymore. Others believe they won’t attack you if you don’t believe in them. 

I was once in that bandwagon. I acted as if I don’t see them, they won’t see me too. I ignored the fact that there is another world that influences the world we live in. I ignored the spiritual realm. When I encountered that verse where Paul says we are not fighting a physical battle but one against principalities and authorities, I feel unsettled. Like now so what? So I assumed it. 

Until recent incidents in my life that have left me with no option but to face my fears. But I felt so  unknowledgeable about this kind of world. Like I know a lot about quoting verses about blessings and how God is for me who can be against me bla bla bla. But when it comes to a Spiritual warfare, the only line I knew was ” I rebuke this in Jesus name”, and I felt as if that isn’t enough. 

So I asked God for knowledge. And He has led me to a whole new world I’ve been operating under without acknowledging it. I’ve been perishing for lack of knowledge. 

There is so much I’ve learnt that I can’t share as of now, but the most important points have come from 1 Corinthians 2; 14. 

1. The natural/unspiritual man

1 Corinthians 2:14

[14]But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither   can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

That verse says that they will not receive things of the spirit. The natural man is the lady you meet who does not believe in witchcraft. Its the man who has never heard of ancestral curses and covenants and neither is he interested in hearing about it. Its the people who call churches, ” za kuokoka”. These are spiritual things, they require spiritual discernment. But the  unspiritual man will not receive anything that requires the spirit to interpret or help. 

Why? Because they are foolishness unto him. They’ll call those who go around binding witchcraft and demonic attacks as ‘uncivilized’. This natural man doesn’t just understand how in this century and age, people are still bothered about such kind of stuff. 

This natural man/ unspiritual man is actually in church. Notice, we are not talking about unbelievers. The same way that verse that says, ” my people perish for lack of knowledge ” is not for unbelievers. Its means Christians/ people in Christ are the ones afflicted by that lack of knowledge. 

We are here not talking about Njoroge or Peter or Mary who is an unbeliever and doesn’t believe in the existence of a spiritual realm. 

We are talking about those Christians who go to church each Sunday, who read their bibles everyday and pray, but fail to acknowledge that there are things that happen in their lives as a direct result of the things happening in the spiritual world. 

But we all can’t start blaming everything in our lives to evil forces , can we? I mean some sicknesses are just normal, right? Poverty is just poverty, right? Plus how do we even go about these world? Does the Bible talk about it? 

This leads us to the next point

2. Covenants

We see covenants from Genesis to Revelation. Its a constant theme in the bible. So what does this have to do with witchcraft, demons and curses? 

The spiritual world operates under covenants. God respects and uses covenants. That’s why we see Him making a covenant with Abraham and severally with the Israelites. 

And to show how real covenants are, there is a tale in Joshua 9-10 about the Gibeonite Treaty. God had commanded the Israelites to wipe out the Canaanites. It was a clear instruction. This nation under guise tricked the Israelites into making a covenant of peace with them. Guess what? God respected that covenant. It went against his wishes, but it was a covenant. And the Spiritual world where both God and evil forces operate it, respect covenants. None can go against them. 

Which is why it is so possible for a Christian to make a covenant with the devil while still remaining saved. Just because Jesus came to set us free doesn’t mean we can’t enter into covenants of bondage with the devil. 

But an important fact to understand about covenants is that they are Voluntary . 

 No one is forced to take them. God doesn’t force you to accept salvation. The devil didn’t force Adam and eve to eat the forbidden fruit. 

Human beings have to agree to these spiritual covenants for them to manifest in the actual world. 

Which leads us to the next point, how do we get into covenants with God or evil spirits? 

Why do we pray using God’s word? Because we are agreeing with it. We are agreeing to stay in the Lord and as a result we shall be like planted trees by a river producing fruits in its time. God kept on reminding the Israelites when they cried unto him about calamities, about specific parts of the covenant with Him they had not done. About getting into covenants with God, the bible has a dozen examples of that. And some are quite plain. 

But about getting into covenants with the evil spirits..that’s where the devil takes the field day. 

We as Christians are extremely ignorant. Extremely naive. 

 I’m sure you have noticed some generational things that run through families. For example, there are some families that struggle with alcoholism. From the grandfather to his kids to the current generation. Clearly even pastors agree its a spiritual warfare on that family using alcohol. But even countless prayers generation after generation doesn’t stop it. 

Why? It was a covenant. And unless its broken ( which is possible by the way), not even prayers using Jesus name will break it. There are demons that went out instantly Jesus came into the picture. While there are others that took a little fight. But there are others that Christ said required fasting and praying. 

Same thing, some covenants can be broken by a simple prayer. Others require more prayer. While others require way more than that. 

So you can imagine the kind of trouble we are in when we have no idea what covenants we are operating under. 

And maybe we are entering into more covenants unknowingly. 

There are many ways of entering into covenants with the devil. One major one is through dreams. 

I don’t know much, I’m also looking to learn, but i’ll leave us with a verse. 

1 Corinthians 2;15

1 Corinthians 2:15

[15]But he that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man.

Another version says the Spiritual man assesses all things. 

The only way to discern is to feed and grow our spiritual man. That way, we can now judge all things in our lives and hold them according to the word of God. God said our children shall not beg for bread, so why did my grandfather die poor, my father die poor and now my children are begging for bread? What is wrong? 

The only way to survive and wage spiritual warfare is to know the word of God. What does it say about how the life of a man whose hope is in the Lord should be? What did Christ say blessed is the man who does what? 

Are you a spiritual man or a natural man?


6 words that describe the Laws of the Lord. 

If asked to describe the word of God, what adjectives would you use? Like how do you perceive it? When you look at the way God expects you to live, like giving not expecting back, offering the second cheek to be slapped too, loving and praying for your enemies, etc, what comes to mind? 
People have sort to describe the laws of the Lord in various ways.

Some think they are a bit outdated. In these financial times, who would give not expecting back? Here in my town, people come out for harambees vigorously. Like they’ll turn up for your function and raise money for you. I thought it was out of loving your neighbour as thyself ,until when with time I noticed a pattern. Everyone here at some point has a function. And if they don’t, they create one. And in most cases, only the people you contributed to in their functions will contribute in yours and they’ll most probably contribute the same amount you gave in theirs. Not more nor less. Those who don’t pay back the favor get cut off the friend list. Doesn’t sound much like what the laws of the Lord say, right? But it seems much practical. 

And preachers everywhere are trying their best to show that God’s word is still relevant. Dating preaching is trying its best to show that the purity message they swear by is found in the bible while the tithing brigade will do its best to avoid being asked why tithing isn’t talked about in the New Testament.

 And on and on people describe the word of God depending on their interactions with it. 

So it was a delightful surprise on Sunday when the preacher mentioned a certain verse during his sermon. You know those ones he mentions as he passes by and asks you to read later. And on that note, how many of us go back to read those 3 or 4 extra verses that the preachers mention for you to read later? I’ve realised I rarely do. Something I should seriously change. I mean, why note it down if its not useful? 

Anyway, so this specific verses describe what the laws of the Lord are according to itself. Like it uses adjectives to show us what God’s word can be described as. And the choice of words caught my attention. 

So here we go. 

Psalms 19;7-9

The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul. The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple. The precepts of the Lord are right,giving joy to the heart. The commands of the Lord are radiant,giving light to the eyes. The fear of the Lord is pure,enduring forever. The ordinances of the Lord are sure and altogether righteous. 


What does perfect mean? Without fault or mistake. The laws of the Lord have no fault in them and no mistake was made while making them. Yesterday we went to eat lunch somewhere, and one of us ordered a meal and even specified how he wanted it. When it was brought, he complained that he had asked for a different meal. And the customer being king, his food was exchanged. But as we had seen the whole exchange, we pointed it out to him, that he had made a mistake. 

When you mistake what you want someone to bring to you or do, it means the results you get won’t be what you expected. They’ll be flawed. And here psalms 19;7 explains that God didn’t do any mistake when laying down any of his laws. 

So when God says he loves obedience and not sacrifice, and our human logic prefers sacrifice not obedience, its not in our position to correct what God prefers. He didn’t make a mistake. His law is perfect. Which is why adding things to His word sees us as Christians chase away other people from church instead of bringing them in. It is perfect as it is. It works as it is. 

Perfect also means fitting its definition precisely. The laws of the Lord are what they are. They are what is expected of us. Just as God says He is who He is, His laws fit into what they say they are precisely. 

….reviving the soul. Why is perfectness tied to revival of the soul?

What does revival mean? To return to life. To cause to return strength or life. 

Life plays us roughly at times. We hurt, we live in pain, we get abused, we neglect our souls and at times our souls get so broken that they die and leave us only existing physically. And all that because we live in an imperfect word. 

Meaning, that our souls can’t be brought back to life, nor their strength returned by anything in this imperfect world that broke them in the first place. 

Only perfect can heal. Only perfect can bring us back to life. That’s why psalms 19;7 says, The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul. 

2. Trustworthy 

Trustworthy means deserving of trust. Reliable. 

In other words, the law of the Lord is reliable, believable,credible,dependable, ethical, honest, convincing, righteous and unfailing among many other synonyms. 

You can place your bet on the God’s word. It is sure. You can stand on it. It won’t be 99.9% sure, it is a 100% reliable. 

You know the way at times we have to remind ourselves that God has our back, not to worry, He said He is with us. Sometimes we worry so much and kinda doubt whether our situation is still under God’s control. I mean, is what He said still going to pass yet my circumstances feel like the opposite? Is God good as He says as I experience injustice and evil? We indirectly or even directly question God’s word every once in a while especially by worrying or trying to do things our way. 

Yet, here we are told that if there is something that is trustworthy, it is God’s word. You can take it to the bank. You can risk your life with it. You know that meme that asks, ” if you were told to call one person and your life will be spared if they don’t pick, who would you call?” Majority if not all of us, have that person whose word doesn’t hold water. Sometimes we even know many. 

I remember when I was young, I really wanted to go visit my grandma almost during all holidays. And my mum would promise that I would go visit her in the next holiday. And for some reason, that promise kept being broken . Till it reached a point, I stopped trusting her word. I simply waited for the day I’ll go. I stopped believing what she said was true even when it came to pass in one of those holidays. Why? It had failed over 6 times. 

And that’s how most of us act with God. We take a part of His word and claim it. Let’s say the part that says, “Ask and it shall be given to you”. We mix it with the verse saying, ” even faith as little as a mustard seed shall be able to say to a mountain move and it moves”. We have faith the size of the whole mustard tree and ask for something really way less than moving a mountain, knowing that we shall get it. Then we don’t get what we asked for, yet we had all requirements. Our requests were quite qualified to be answered.

 So what do we do after various unanswered prayers? We lose trust in the Word of God. We doubt its credibility. We stop relying on it. Due to our past interactions with it turning out to be half true and half not true. 

This is why I found it to be such a relief that God’s word is trustworthy. That means, that if I take it to the Lord expecting what the word says I should get and get different results, the problem isn’t the word, its either on me or in my prayer. And those unanswered prayers or ‘wrongly’ answered prayers should see me seek God for us to discuss what is wrong and how to correct it. You can read more about the fallacy that God answers are Yes, No and Wait here. 

…..making wise the simple

The trustworthiness of God’s laws is tied to making wise the simple. 

Who are wise people? For me, I think you are wise if you make decisions that over and over save you from disaster, or give you an upper hand than others or your view of things is way better than that of an average person. Wise people can solve complex issues by using very simple solutions. Remember Solomon and the two women claiming the same baby? That was wisdom right there. 

And here we are told  that The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple. 

What I see here, is that we have this word that we can rely on it a 100%. Whereas humans make decisions based on what they think is right, we should make decisions based on God’s word. The outcome will be moving from simple people( people who get it right once in a while and fall into traps other times) to wise people ( whose  decisions reek of wisdom over and over again). That is the result of depending on a reliable Word. 


Right means correctness or reason. Something correct. You got it right. The precepts of the Lord are right. Like they won’t lead you astray. They will lead you to a correct path in life. 

Right also means appropriate. Perfectly suit for the purpose. Like God’s laws are perfectly suited to rule our lives. We should walk by them. They are suitable for the purpose they were made for. That is to guide our lives. 

….giving joy to the heart. It only makes sense, that if our lives are guided by something appropriate, something suited for us, then even in the middle of a storm, our hearts will be peaceful. Its like having a compass, even in a desert, you know you are on the right path. So regardless of circumstances in our lives, we are glad to know that the precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart. 


Radiant can mean emitting or proceeding as if from a center. Or beaming with vivacity or happiness. 

The commands of the Lord are Radiant, giving light to the eyes. 

You remember the part about the revival of the soul? Looking at someone’s eyes you can know if they are dead or sad inside. Here we see that God’s commands, if followed will make us alive inside, they’ll be our source of ‘life’, our life will be from the center, which is God and therefore, we shall not merely exist but shall have life and life in abundance. Even by looking at us, the world shall sense a certain vivacity or happiness that doesn’t stem from how we are doing in life but from something way deeper than our lives. The commands of the Lord are Radiant and therefore shall give light to our eyes. 


The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever. 

Pure means with no imperfections. Pure things last longer than impure stuff. For example, iron can last as iron for thousands of years, but mix it with oxygen and hydrogen. It rusts. It changes to something else. It can stay for a while longer, but the quality is compromised. 

Same with God’s word. It has not a single blemish with it. It doesn’t lie. It is enough and adequate. You just can’t fault it. Which is why, famous people’s word can last for 200 years others for a 1000 years, but only God’s word will forever. Why, it will never stop being sure or true. Whether on this earth or another one. No wonder it endures forever. Imagine resting your faith on words that are pure and will endure forever? 


Sure means certain to act or be in a certain way. 

The ordinances of the Lord are sure. They are certain. Failsafe. What the word of God says is true. It stands the test of time. Its not outdated or for future use. Even as at this moment, the word of God stands. It is true. 

 …and altogether righteous. And after 6 adjectives describing the Laws of the Lord, the psalmist sums it up by saying that they are Righteous. God is righteous. So are His laws. They are morally justifiable. They are virtuous. 

I don’t know what you thought of God’s word before, but internalizing this three verses ( psalm 19;7-9) gives one a deeper assurance of God. Like on top of being who He says He is, His word can also be trusted. It is perfect, it is trustworthy, it is right, it is radiant, it is pure and sure. 

Take it to the lord in prayer. 

One of the hard places to be in your life is to be at odds with God. And I’m not talking of an unbeliever, I’m talking of a born again Christian whose walk with God is active. 

When you do everything ‘right’, like you know everything that was in your powers to do, you did it to the best of your ability, but still your situation or circumstance seem to be going in the exact opposite direction of the word ‘right’. You look at the word, check; you obeyed it, you look at the leading of the Holy Spirit; check you obeyed it, you look at you’d faith, check, there is no doubt in sight, then you look at how your life is panning out and everything that could go wrong actually goes wrong. 

What do we do? That’s when no encouragement gets in there. We get angry at God. Disappointed. Frustrated at His apparent inaction. But in most cases we will die first before taking it to Him. Why? We’ve never been taught to question God. We were taught that God is always right, which is true, and He knows best, which is true. So in our heads, its wrong to complain or even air our grievances, with Him. It just seems out of place. I mean, won’t God strike us dead? How dare we? So some leave this God, while the rest of us assume that that episode didn’t happen. 

I remember the first time I aired my grievances with God seriously to God. Last year actually. My relationship with God had been growing tremendously. We were getting used to each other and closer. For the first time in my life I surrendered everything to God. And God on the other side acted like my best friend. I got used to it. So anything God said, I did. He said I jump, I didn’t have time to ask how high, I was already in the air. And things were working out. Quite well actually. I had this good thing going on in me. 

Until when things started going wrong. All of them. At first I thought,” I’m so lucky this time, since I have God by my side, si He’ll just sort me out..kwanza the way we are close nowadays “. So I took my situation to Him. God was there, He ensured I didn’t feel abandoned. But did my circumstances change for the better? Wrong, they became worse. 

And that’s when I started becoming frustrated with God. His word and His presence in me seemed to talk of good tidings. But I was experiencing bad things. I knew that simply because I have God on my side doesn’t insure me against hardships in life. But I also knew that having God on my side meant I had a Savior and Redeemer. Saviour means one who saves, right? So whereas I wasn’t angry at my bad situation ( this are normal in life), I was angry at my God who was seemingly watching it get worse. 

The one thing that took me to take my frustration with God to God was simple; I had no one to take God to. Like I couldn’t report God to anyone else. So here I was, I had put all my trust in God. Entrusted Him with all my pain. And instead I was in worse pain. Why didn’t I walk away? Because I had invested too much in this. My relationship with God was the only right thing I had going on in my life. I wasn’t going to leave it just like that. I mean, where else would I go to? The world? it had played jokes with my life. People? They had made a joke out of my life. So sincerely speaking I had no one else to turn to. And that saw me camp at God’s feet. 

In case you are wondering how that situation turned out, God came and took all glory. It wasn’t an easy path. But we walked it with God. Me complaining on how its not fair to put all your trust in one who let’s your situations go from worse to worst, God being all gentleman and loving me immensely through out my hardships.

 And one thing, I have come to realise, is that God can handle it. He can handle us at our worst. And even more importantly, he can handle your frustrations at Him and with Him. 

Its one thing to doubt, and its another to have unbelief. 

Unbelief is what most unbelievers have, where you don’t trust God exists or you don’t trust whom He says is . Unbelief takes you away from God. Unbelief walks away. 

Doubt, is when what God says in His word, and what is going on in your life, don’t go hand in hand. You thus start wondering whether the problem is on your side, your prayers or on God. 

And you can’t have a healthy relationship with God unless you trust Who he is fully and What he says fully. Then if things go amiss, it won’t be that hard to face Him with your facts at hand and what He said which you believed in but doesn’t seem to be the reality. 

Unbelief asks, “Why would a Good God allow…..”

Doubt asks ”  God, why would you allow…”

You notice one is addressed to God, the other has already given up on God. 

The world of Christians just like other people prefer telling success stories more than failures. Like we would rather talk of God’s blessings and the many things He has done for us, than those things we hoped on God and He didn’t come through for us. Not that testimonies aren’t real or necessary, but life isn’t only majorly made of happiness. We go through stuff, and at times, at the hand of God. 

Don’t go to social media or your friends asking for help, only God can help you. Take it to the Lord in prayer. Trust me, God can handle it. Don’t wait till you are okay to do it, go to God with all your emotions and feelings. He created you, He can handle you. Take to Him His word and your situation. He knows them both. 

And ultimately, go to God as your father. We get angry at our fathers, we sometimes don’t agree with their way of doing things, but we always know that they are smarter than us and love us. God is love. And He loves us. 

Take it to the Lord in prayer. 

To Pray is to Change. 

I’ve been reading this book titled Celebration of Disciplines; The path to Spiritual Growth by Richard Foster. I decided to read it slowly, like chapter by chapter each week since it talks of Disciplines,these are things that are mastered by action not known by just reading alone. I like his style of writing. He counters all arguments you have, even before you raise them. Its the kind of book critical thinkers will enjoy since he talks to you as if in a bid to win you over on his side. Not as if you were already on his side. 

So the first discipline was meditation. I’ll admit I never thought meditation had anything to do with my spiritual growth. When the psalmist says he meditates upon God’s word day and night, in my head that meant thinking, not the meditation that yoga people do. Not that that’s the one Richard Foster is advocating for, but it opened my mind to something I had never considered doing. And he describes christian meditation as the ability to hear God’s voice and obey his word. 

But that is not what I want us to talk about. Its the second discipline that has floored me. 

So I open the second discipline which is prayer, and I felt like skipping onto the third one. I mean, I knew I didn’t know everything about prayers, but I also knew that at least of all spiritual disciplines, I’m good at this one. But after little consideration I decided to read it as a by the way. Sharon, a close friend of mine, always says, there is no wasted knowledge. 

So as I read, I realise that my idea of prayer is kinda slightly different from his. According to him, to pray is to change. I mean, I know prayer isn’t just about asking and receiving, and I know its about fellowship with God, and I agree with him that praying should be more listening than talking( something I should improve on), but to pray is to change? I felt as if that had a deeper meaning than I understood. 

So when he recommended another book that helped him, I went looking for it. The title of the book even just caught my attention. With Christ in the school of Prayer by Andrew Murray. 

Na tusema tu, nimejua sijui ( I’ve realised how ignorant I was). Every chapter here in this book on prayer is exposing my foolishness which I thought was wisdom when I wanted to skip the chapter on prayer. And indeed as the book says, I’m with Christ in the school of prayer. And I’ll share some of our lessons so far. 

You remember the Samaritan woman? Well, I think that’s the first time Jesus talks of prayer. And he tells the woman that a time is coming when people shall worship the father in truth and in spirit. And that that hour has come. 

I’ve heard the above verse many times but seems I understood it all wrong. 

When Jesus says worshipping the father in spirit, what does that mean? This simply means being in harmony with the father. And the only way to be in harmony with the father is by having a ‘sonship’ kind of situation with him. And that only comes through Christ. No wonder Jesus tells the woman, an hour is coming, and now is that hour. Before Jesus we could not worship the father in spirit because the one who was to make us sons, and thus giving us same spirit with the father had not yet come. You notice in the Old Testament no one addressed God as my father personally? So to pray in spirit, is not something that comes from your mind to God, its a spirit thing( its like an exchange between two spirits that are walking in harmony).

And what does in truth mean? I always thought it meant praying according to God’s word. Or at least praying sincerely. Well, you remember to pray is to change? Same concept here, in truth means for real. Like that fellowship you have with God brought about using prayer shall be visible in your life. Like your daily life shall reflect the fellowship you have with God inside there.  No wonder Jesus scraps off people going to a certain temple or place to worship..the worshippers God desires shall do so wherever they are. They  shall be walking temples. And God dwelling in them shall be shown in the way they think, act or speak. It shall be for real this time. Not just knowing God’s word in your mind, but it not having any impact in your daily life. 

But what caught my attention the most was the Lord’s prayer. I knew it would be there, I actually would not have been surprised if i had found that the book was based on this one example of prayer. But he covers it in one chapter. But he does it in a very interesting way. This perspective he has tackled it from, changes the Lord’s prayer from an example of how we should pray, to an example of how we should live. 

Interesting to know that Jesus didn’t teach his disciples how to preach but he taught them how to pray. And more interesting to note that after spending time with Jesus, him healing the sick, chasing out demons, condemning the Pharisees’s behavior, the only thing they asked Jesus to teach them was how to pray. They must have noticed that Jesus prayed differently and that that difference is what would give them the rest of those things they could have asked to be taught but didn’t. That shows us the importance of prayer in our lives. 

Anyway onto our father’s prayer. 

Our father who art in heaven. 

Jesus by this opening line, gives us the attitude we are supposed to approach our God with in prayer. Not as a King( which God is), not as a Rock, or Creator or Owner of the universe but as our father. You see, assume you work with your father in a family owned business. When you are at work, you’ll approach your father as the CEO of the company that he is, not as your father, but while at home, you’ll call him dad and maybe even crack irrelevant jokes. Jesus knows God has many aspects of himself that we know of. And He tells us to approach our God as our father at any given point. 

This cancels out a lot of fears we have. A son knows the father cares for him. A son will never refuse to run to the father simply because he is dirty or injured. Actually, that will be more reason for a child to run to his father. But a person might refuse to go see the king when he or she feels dirty, right? That’s why Jesus tells us to approach prayer with the attitude of we are going to see our loving father. This isn’t just a concept we are supposed to read and know, we are supposed to internalize it and let it drive away all fears we might have ever had about approaching our dad. Its love simply explained.

Hallowed be thy name. 

Hallowed means consecrated or sanctified, sacred or holy. And how will this happen? This is practical in our lives. Remember prayer isn’t something we say but to pray is to change? Well, if we allow the Holy Spirit to lead our lives, then God’s name will be hallowed in our lives( practically- how we live daily). Only Him can hallow his name, we can’t do that by our own. No wonder we pray that Hallowed be thy name. 

Thy kingdom come

God is a king, he has a kingdom in which the son Jesus is an heir. We are sons too by virtue of Christ. But whereas Christ is in heaven, where God’s kingdom is already manifested, we are on earth where God’s kingdom hasn’t been manifested fully. No wonder after approaching God as our father, asking that His name be glorified, we are now moving onto the next business of the day. That our dad’s kingdom be brought where we are. Isn’t it only natural for a son of a king to want his father’s kingdom be extended? Especially if you are heir to it?

 No wonder Jesus was insisting on us seeing God as a father. You see, a soldier might fight for the king, but they don’t always have the King’s interest at heart, no wonder some defect and go form their own kingdoms. Same concept, we’ll struggle to do God’s will and spread his gospel unless we too share in the same heart behind it. Unless you understand the whole ‘Sonship’ that Christ came to unveil, then you’ll forever struggle to do God’s will and follow God’s word. Not that as a son its easier, but it flows from a place deeper than your mind. It comes from knowing that you are forever accepted and also forever working towards being like the first born; Jesus Christ. This goes hand in hand with Thy will be done in Heaven as it is on earth. 

Give us this day our daily bread

Now before we tackle this, did you notice that the Lord’s prayer starts with Thy Name, Thy Kingdom and Thy Will before moving onto Give us, Forgive Us ,Lead us and deliver us?  Just like with the commandments, we start with God first not our needs or us.  That should be the attitude, what is God’s will for me, my family, my country and earth? That should come before what you would want for yourself, your family and country.

Jesus told us that our father knows our needs even before we ask of them. That means that all those prayers I have been making trying to convince God to give me something were ill advised on my part( the convincing part that is). God knows what I need, when I need it and how I need it. He doesn’t have to be quoted for his scripture where he is promising me something for him to suddenly remember that He said so thus should do so because Mercy needs this thing saa hii. Aki I’m now realising how much I didn’t know how to pray ( like what was I doing!? He he )

And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors

Now that we have been given our daily bread to feed our body, we need soul food. That’s how Christ sees it. And this shouldn’t be a formality because only confessed sins shall be forgiven. Like by the time we leave or go to God, you should be able to say that you know of no one whom you do not heartily love. Doesn’t that go against our saying, “Time heals”. You know, that part where we carry on grudges for years because we are waiting for time to tone them down. Well, healing may take time, but forgiving shouldn’t. Imagine if God forgave our sins the way we forgive others…some of us would not be forgiven so easily. 

And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one.

After our daily bread, our soul being sorted out, comes maintainance sasa. This means not just sticking with God for a day or two but forever. And the thing that would make us not to abide in him are temptations and the evil one. We thus pray that God keeps us in him and that he delivers us from the evil one who is prowling around looking for someone to devour. 

After such an intense prayer of dedicating yourself to God, your requests to him, and asking him to be with you, tell me how that doesn’t result to change? 

I’m excited to just seat at Jesus’ feet and have him teach me how to pray just like he did with the disciples. Like really excited. I didn’t know I was this unknowledgeable. 

Anyway, see? To pray is to change. 

The 300. 

I’m sure you’ve heard Gideon’s story over and over again. And maybe learnt lessons from it. On how God took the least man of the least family in the Manasseh clan and used him to bring victory to Israelites. Now maybe you’ve pictured yourself as Gideon at times, someone who has trust and self-esteem issues but who God has called nevertheless for His purposes.

But today I want us to picture ourselves, not as Gideon, but as one of the 300 men that God used under Gideon’s leadership. 

From Judges 6;13, we see Gideon asking the angel of God, that if surely God was with them, then why were they going through hell literally? The hell I’m talking about here is explained at the start of chapter 6. The midianites used to wait for Israelites to plant, then come with their cattle and destroy everything. The Israelites by the time God was choosing Gideon, were living in dens made in mountains and caves. They were internally displaced people in their own land. The angel of the Lord even found Gideon beating wheat in a winepress, now that’s not normal. Wheat is supposed to be beaten in the field or at home, but it shows us the kind of fear all Israelites were living in. They were afraid. They were angry. They were bitter at the Lord. They were on the verge of dying off. 

Then in the middle of them hiding out in caves and dens, this guy nowadays called Jerubbaal comes telling them to stand up and fight. First of all, why has Gideon’s name changed to Jerubbaal? And as an Israelite man, what would convince you to follow this guy?

To answer the first question, the first impression Gideon gave Israelites was a bad one. It changed his name and earned him a reputation, albeit not a good one. So after God’s Angel appears ,God tells Gideon to take down Baal’s altar in his father’s place and instead replace it with His and make Him a sacrifice of his father’s bull. Gideon is a man afraid of repercussions. He knows taking down that altar will bring issues. But what does he do? He obeys God while still afraid. He does what God wants but at night. But that doesn’t save him from the repercussions he was afraid of. The next morning the people of the town come looking for him. How dare the least man of the least family bring down their altar? But his father( owner of the baal altar and of the bull sacrificed to now God), who we expect to be angry at Gideon, tells the townspeople to let their god (Baal) contend for himself. That’s how he gets the name, Jerubbaal meaning let Baal contend for himself.  

To digress a bit..Doesn’t this sound fishy? As much as blood is thicker than water, why would your father leave you to be killed a god instead of people? Unless even his father knew the powerlessness of Baal. As much as he had Baal’s altar and used to sacrifice for him bulls, he knew that when shove comes to push, this god of his is entirely powerless.

And the above right there explains why 32, 000 men were willing to follow this least man of the least family of a small clan who came in the name of the Lord. They didn’t have faith in Gideon. But as much as they held a grudge towards God for letting evil befall them, they knew the gods they worshipped ( which was the reason they were under Midianites rules in the first place) were powerless to save. They knew that if there was any hope for them, then it could only come from this God whom their fathers told them about. 

But then, the Midianites and their cattle looked like the sand of the sea. Countless. Mighty. We Kenyans say numbers don’t lie. These guys had the numbers and they knew it and the Israelites knew it. So as much as 32, 000 men showed up, they left tens of thousands of Israelite men in the caves and dens who saw the Midianites numbers and freaked out. These 32000 were the radicals. The ones who said, better we try or at least die trying. 

Then Gideon calls these 32, 000 men and instead of giving them a strategy, he tells those who are afraid and trembling to go home. Remember these 32,000 are atleast the courageous ones out of the Israelite men. But now that there is a leeway to go home, 22,000 men go. These are the ones who maybe have surviving family members who were calling them back. They are ones who were chochwad( convinced) by their friends to come fight in a battle. But inside there they knew they were not strong enough. Remember since Midianites started ruling over then, Israelites had never trained their military. They just had men who had good knowledge of how to makes caves and camouflage their dens and like Gideon do the right thing in the wrong place( beat wheat in the winepress) so as to survive. 

Now, why did 10,000 still remain? What was driving these guys? Were they not afraid? Did they not see the tyranny of numbers that the Midianites had? Did they not see themselves and realise they would be overpowered even before the war begun? Did they not see Gideon and realise this guy was not an army general? Most probably Gideon had never been in a war before. But this 10,000 remained. 

My thinking is that they were tired. The Midianites had fikishad them that point of ” wacha kiumane sasa”. They were angry. As much as they knew they could be defeated, they were fed up of hiding in caves and dens in their own land. They were angry at having to live like refugees in their land. And maybe they had nothing to look forward to at home. Or maybe, some trusted in this God they had heard about from their fathers. And were willing to give this God a chance to prove Himself. We might never know why they stayed. 

And then Gideon calls the 10,000. Now they are thinking, here comes the war strategy against the Midianites. Operation flush out the Midianites. Instead ,this character ,takes them to a river for a water break. I mean, the war hasn’t yet begun, they are not yet thirsty. But they drink the water. 

And yet again, Gideon calls them and tell the ones who drank the water kneeling down to go home. Imagine what this army felt. Both the 300 who remain and the 9700 men who go home. Like is this guy serious?? You see we read this passage assuming this men knew it was God telling then to do these things. But its Gideon telling them. Yes, Gideon is receiving these instructions from God but what this men have been going through so far is told to them by Gideon. And Gideon at this point is not being called Gideon, he is Jerubbaal, wanted man by Baal. 

So imagine you are now the 300. You started as 32,000 people but your army general seems to not understand that numbers don’t lie. There is security in numbers. If you listen to us, even in failure people feel good if they were many. Someone would rather recount a tale of how they were conned by someone as a chama or group but its very embarrassing if you were the only one conned. Everyone seems to know that besides their Army commander. He seems to have a thing for operating against common sense. Remember he hasn’t even told them what the strategy is if there is any. 

And that’s what God calls us to be at times. The 300. People who against all odds hold on to the mission at hand. Sometimes God calls us and doesn’t tell us what we are going to do or be with. When that happens, we get excited and jump on the mission train with all our friends. Then round one of elimination, and you remain few. But at least you have familiar faces around. So it can’t be that bad. Then another round of elimination and you remain the only familiar face you know of out of these 300. Do you give up? 

Imagine the families and wives of the 300. When they were 32,000 men, the families might have supported them abit. When they were 10,000 they started raining in  questions. Now that they are 300, as a wife or father of these men, would you still advice your man to stick in there with this small crazy general? Probably no. But we don’t see any of the 300 defecting. 

My lesson here is that at times, my journey is mine alone. We might have been a crowd while starting out but if only a handful remain, and I’m among them, it doesn’t mean I’m wrong or in the wrong place. Which is why its important to follow your heart. By your heart I don’t mean feelings. I mean what your inner self is telling you, not what the world says or numbers. They lie at times. Or rather, their truth might not be your truth. 

You all know how the rest of the story proceeds. Their army general gives them a trumpets and empty jars with torches in them. But before he does that he has woken them up by encouraging them and telling then to arise for the Lord has given the Midianites into their hands. And here we learn that sometimes the hardest part was starting out. After deciding to stay with Gideon, we see God encouraging them. When they were 32,000 or 10,000, Gideon didn’t seem this confident. But now that they are 300 Gideon now seems like the leader he was supposed to be. 

Encouraging them and now giving them the strategy they have all been waiting for. It might be crazy but atleast its something. We don’t see them being worried or questioning or grumbling as the Israelites are used to doing. They obey. Same with us, sometimes the weapons and strategies that God gives us don’t make sense to us or anyone around. Nothing explains them. But its not our part to make sense out of what God calls us to do. We don’t see the bigger picture but God does. And we should rest in that belief. 

And here comes in something we’ve heard a hundred times, what’s in your hand? Gideon didn’t go to buy this weapons of mass destruction ( read trumpets and empty jars with torches inside). Judges 7;8 tells us that Gideon took them from the 10,000 men when he was sending them the 9700 men home. God in most cases doesn’t introduce new weapons to fight out our old common battles. He uses us( even when we are afraid and broken) and whatever we have in our hands. Be it a talent or skill. Probably these 300 men had never been trained for war, meaning unlike some David’s men in the later books of the Bible, these men were not proficient users of swords and knives. But they knew how to blow a trumpet. And some of them even came with jars and torches for obvious use, carrying water and seeing at night. God used their skills and objects to lead them to victory. Looking at it from this point of view, we see God as being so caring as not wanting to stress them by teaching then new skills or starting to give them a military training manual just a few hours to wartime. 

But I’m sure the 300 at that time didn’t see it that way. They didn’t see it from the point of view of God giving them the easiest way out. The way that had the least stress. But they went ahead with this strategy. That carry these 3 things and do as the army general did. And this right here is where we are asked, do you believe the bible literally? Like do you think most of the promises of God to you and His assurances are for real as of now? Like when He says He is with you all the times, when you are being oppressed by the Midianites ( going through a rough patch) are those words true to you literally? Do you believe them at that point? 

And that’s what God calls us to do. To believe in Him despite the numbers ( the hardness of your circumstance which is real and true by the way), despite yourself( your ability is which is way limited when compared to the hardship or circumstance you are going through) and despite what He calls us to do( which at that point will seem downright crazy and even unreasonable, or too easy/simple to be for real). God calls us to trust Him literally, like as of now and here, and know that He is God. 

We all know what happens next, the 300 are divided into 100 and the 100 are all given a side to hold. If the Midianites were as many as we are told they are, and the now divided into 100 per troop army is supposed to hold their place or surround them, then it is very likely each man found himself alone. Judges 7;21 tells us each man held his place. What this means is that as much as we are in a common mission, each of us has to hold their place alone. Your position matters and is important. Take it seriously. It was at night, they have these 3 simple objects at hand, they are alert looking out for Gideon to make a sign, they don’t even know what he’ll do exactly. He told them to follow what he’ll do. Everyone, is alone looking down at the Midianites camp that is like the sands of the sea . They are waiting. 

And if life is anything to go by, waiting is one of the hardest things to do. And at some point in life, we will be alone, led by some crazy guy, with some crazy instructions, facing a mountain of a problem ahead of us and all we will be required to do is wait. Waiting for what to happen exactly? We don’t know. And when that time comes, only our assurance in God will keep us sane. Definitely the world by then might have ruled us out, our hearts might have gotten tired of questioning us, and all we’ll have to hold onto at that point, is God said. And the fact that God said will be enough. Its always enough. 

The story goes on and the war begins and thousands of Israelite men from various clans join in. Some even want to start war with Gideon for not calling them, like seriously? 

But following the 300, they must feel good seeing the hand of God. But guess what? They are only human, they grow weary. And as they pass somewhere, 2 times Gideon asks for them loaves of bread, and 2 times those people refuse arrogantly. Just because you are now winning is still not enough for people to now see your point of view that you have been explaining all along. And its okay. Gideon doesn’t start arguing with them. He moves on with the 300 but promises to be back. 

We see God through  Gideon. By the end of it, Gideon is asked to lead in verse 23 of chapter 8 but He now knows God personally and he refuses. He tells them that the Lord will rule over them. No one has an experience with God and stays the same. You grow and your understanding of God grows. 

But we also see God through the 300. And in most cases we’ll be called to be them. If Gideon is anything to go by, they must have been afraid and scared, but they followed this God anyway. We might never get the right circumstances to obey God in our lives. So we’ll do it anyway. 

I just got a revelation!

God is so amazing. 

So a close friend of mine complemented me about my spiritual life. She said she admires how committed I am to God and my closeness with Him. Now, instead of saying thank you after that complement, i got confused. In my head, complements should be of things that are in my power. Like clothes, hardwork, being an amazing friend etc. But on my spiritual life, God was entirely to blame. 

To take things even further, God has been revealing to me how all along He has been holding me. There were times I was looking back and thought that my seeking God and commitment to reading His word often and praying, were what kept my spiritual life alive. Seeking and God and praying are important, but unless God builds with the builders, the builders build in vain.  Then I’ve gone through a wilderness for the last 3 months and God has been the one holding my hand every single day. So He corrected me and showed me that even when I thought I was the one holding on, God was the one still holding me.

So see, God is to blame for my spiritual life. So in my head, He was the one to get the complement not me. But my boyfriend(I heard bae is outdated,what has replaced it?) thought differently. According to Him, i’m alive and working towards being more Christlike. Its not bad for me to get that complement about my spiritual life. I still didn’t get it. So when I woke up, part of my daily devotions is usually from Charles Spurgeon.

 Guess what the devotion was on today? Gideon and his army. He told them to shout, “The sword of the Lord and of Gideon”. Basically he was saying that the two go hand in hand. God does His work. And then He uses us as instruments to go forth and testify of His goodness. Its wrong to say only the Sword of the Lord alone, because then it means we as Jesus’s followers are not doing the work bestowed upon us. And idleness isn’t advocated in God’s kingdom.  And its also wrong to say The Sword of Gideon alone, because God is the initiater and enabler of the whole process. That the two go hand in hand. 

That I understood. It made sense. So I now understand that God plays His part, I play mine, and we work together in harmony. Its not pride to be recognized as a tool and instrument and servant of God. Its actually humbling and an honour at the same time. 

So you know how much I love sunsets, right? I was washing the utensils on a window facing outside at around 5pm today and in my heart I just had this fleeting desire to catch today’s sunset. We talked with my cousin till that desire got pushed back into my mind. As we were talking, our discussion brought up things I need to talk to God about. Things I have questions about. So I decide to come into the bedroom for a quiet time. 

Guess what I found? The most amazing reflection of a sunset ever!! Like I looked at the window and in my head I’m thinking” when did the sun shift to this side?” Just to peep outside the window and I see the real sunset at its usual side. So I quickly grab my phone and start taking pictures of the reflection on the window. I’m on top of a table saa hizo. After a few shots I decide to take pictures of the real sunset. 

See the reflection above?

And there is the struggle. I have to take half my body outside the window to take the picture. The sunset is beautiful! But guess what? I don’t get a good picture of it. It looks blurred. And that’s understable considering I’m using a phone not a real camera with the capability of capturing that image. So I continue taking pictures of the reflection. 

That’s the real sunset

And as I sit down on the bed, I want to tell someone about that amazing reflection. And that’s when God decides to use that reflection to teach me what He has been trying to tell me since I got that complement. 

You see, the reflection was the exact copy of the real sunset. It was amazing and using my phone camera, I could capture it fully, without missing a thing. 

On the other hand, the real sunset is the real deal. Its heavenly amazing. Only problem is, using the tool I have in my hand which is my phone camera, I can’t capture it. And to even get a glimpse of it ,in my camera , I have to risk both my body and my phone. And even then, I can’t grasp its fullness and details and beauty. The product I get isn’t anything close to the real deal that it is. 

And so God tells me , that He is the real Sunset, and He wants me to be His reflection. Using our kawaida senses, getting ‘it’ from the source could be a whole task that might even be dangerous. You might have to go to great lengths to get it, risking things in the process and even then you might not get the details of whatever it is that God wants you to get. God’s glory or power might even be the reason you don’t get the whole picture. It might blur your senses.  I don’t even know if I’m explaining this correctly but I’ll try. 

But God is calling me to be His reflection. That way, some Mercy who loves sunsets(in this case God) can come find that using the reflection of God in me, she can capture perfectly all details and lessons and understanding about God that she is supposed to get. She will get that from me, using means she can understand and it will not be risky for her. It will be simple, understable and amazing. The sunset reflection was not an inch less amazing because it was on a window. It got me so excited that I couldn’t keep calm. 

Same way, God wants to find Himself in me. Like on top of Him being amazing, imagine finding that amazingness reflected perfectly in a way you can understand (in this case a human)? Wouldn’t that be simply amazing?

Anyway, finally this matter is being put to rest. If I receive a complement on my spiritual life or if someone admires what I have going on with God, it is as amazing as “To the sword of the Lord and of Mercy”. Both co-exist in harmony. And to God be the Glory. I’m so happy you would think that God has never spoken to me before(but using sunsets? This is a first one between me and God)..but who cares , I Just Got a Revelation!

Desert Diaries

When I started going through a hard time recently..i was confused. Every single day I kept on encountering a challenge after another. Minor ones, big ones, easy ones and difficult ones. Its not like my life has been a smooth ride all along, its just that I have never encountered difficulties in such close proximity with each other. Like on days when I had no challenges, I woke up feeling alone and tired and hopeless. 
And so I went on to God with the whole issue. My prayer? That God tells me what’s going on. I remember telling Him that I don’t mind starving for a whole year if that’s what’s up, provided He tells me before that ‘Mercy, you are going to starve for this whole year or go through A, B, C, D’. I remember complaining to a friend how its not the challenges I have a problem with, its the communication between God and me that I’m struggling with. 

Did God answer me? Of course He did. Using last Sunday’s sermon. We were reading and going through Numbers 1-14. And through that God admonished me while making how He works clear to me. The Israelites used to move depending on the cloud of God that used to be above them. When it started moving, they packed their bags and moved. When it stopped, they stopped. At times it could stop for 2 days and at times for 2 months. No one knew how long they would be in a certain place except God- but God ensured that when it was time to move, He showed them through the cloud. 

God wanted me to understand that He is my cloud. When He says I move, I move, when he says I stay, I stay. For how long? That’s entirely upto Him. But for sure when the time for moving comes, He will tell me or move me. I understood that. 

Did my bad times go away? They got worse. So there I was back again to God with Dear God  I mean, I now know that my life is ordained by God, but whatever I’m going through, is hard. And if you ask me, it doesn’t seem like the word I have from God and my situation are going hand in hand. I was promised prosperity, here I am at the bottom most of things. And so on goes the list. 

So I went back to God. This time round, my strength was at its end. I was weary. And God sent an Angel inform of someone I know to ensure that that spark does not go off yet. She does not know how much God used her, ni zile za she says something to me that only God knows I needed to hear that. Or sends a verse, not knowing that God intentionally chose that because its my favorite chapter in the bible( like with all the complaining I do of how poor I am in memory verses, I know James 1 almost all of it off head, how? I don’t know). 

God is faithful. I told you I’ll tell you this a thousand times and it will still not be an overemphasize. He answered my biggest question of all during this time.  What on earth am I going through?

A wilderness. That’s what I’m going through. And its different from God’s refinery  written about here. A wilderness is where God intentionally picks you up from a mountain/a good place and leads you to a bad place. From enjoyment to discomfort and want. Moses, Jesus and Elijah went through this quite literally. 

Or to describe it otherwise, its the period in between God’s promises and the actual promise coming true. That period between Abraham being promised a son and actually getting Isaac. That period between David being anointed King and actually being King. 

And I’ll just summarize today’s sermon that spoke right into my situation. 

While in the wilderness, there are three things that could happen or tempt you;

1. Prioritizing God’s gifts and promises above the giver. 

Notice, not prioritizing bad or immoral thing; God’s gifts. In my case I had prioritized what God had said He will do in my life and how I’m going to see His goodness in the land of the living. Its not that those things are bad, its just that God should take precedence above them. 

Which is why when Jesus was tempted with bread( something he needed then and sincerely was good for his starving body), he replied, man shall not live by bread(read -the promises and gifts God has told you He will give you) alone, but by God’s word- that is man shall live by the fellowship he or she has with God. On simple terms, God comes first before His deeds or promised deeds in your life. He should be the focus, not his goodies. 

2. The temptation of seeing God/interpreting God through our situation/wilderness.

This is where we look at life and at God through the lenses of what we are going through. We minimize Him or reduce Him to our situation or simply take Him out of the equation completely. We start doubting whether God is really with us. And if He is, why am I going through this? Is God God? Is God good? Is God able? Personally I have struggled with this one, is God willing? Like I know He is mighty and able, but does He really feel like saving me from this situation, because it certainly doesn’t seem that way. 

We were asked this question that struck a chord. But I’ll twist it a bit to suite this, assuming 5 Christians were interviewed for a job, and Kamau got the job. The other 4 didn’t. Who was God with among the 5? Who did God favour among the 5? Definitely all our minds answered Kamau. Yet God’s word shows clearly that He is with all 5 Christians, He loves them equally, He has ordained their lives, He cares for them and will ensure that things work out for the good of all 5. 

What I got from that example is that I usually think that God is with me during good times and when I’m winning. Not when times are rough. Yet, God is with me even through the hard times He leads me through. He promises to never forsake me nor leave me. 

3. Pursuing God’s things the wrong way. 

This is where God has already told you where He is taking you. Like the Israelites knew where they were going. But then we feel and think that maybe God is taking too long or is using hard methods. So what do we do? We take a shortcut or an easier way. To where? Not  back to Egypt, to the land God promised us but we decided to Help God. 

I’ve done this severally with traveling. Like I know God has personally assured me that He will fulfill my wildest dreams and even go beyond when it comes to traveling. But at times I use my own means that I know are not good or moral to just go see somewhere. In the process I get myself into shit that would have been avoided if I just waited upon God. Waiting is not easy as I put it here .But in the long run, from experience, waiting upon God is always worth it. 

So question is, do you trust that whoever took you to the wilderness is faithful enough to see you through it?

Here are 3 things to help us in our wildernesses. 

1. Your identity is from God. 

Its not from your joblessness, sickness, bad marriage, singlehood, financial situation etc. It is from God. Nothing describes you perfectly beyond * God’s Child*. That is who we are. Not our situations, actions or sins. Our God defines us. 

2. Never forget to build your intimacy with God. 

Do your devotions as well as you were doing them when all things were good. It might be hard, but persist. Personally I had started doing deep analysis of the word, that was feeding me immensely. I had absolutely no idea how much I could feed off from the bible until I started reading the word the right way. I wrote about it here.

And then I was dropped right into my wilderness, guess what disappeared? That deep devotion. I still pray and once in a while listen or read the bible. But not as intentional as i was before the wilderness. Definitely I’ll pray for strength to go back to daily devotions. 

Otherwise when God comes, how will I hear Him if I’m not tuned in to Him?

3. You have done nothing to deserve to be here. 

God puts us in these wildernesses. Its a trial or test and not a temptation. A trial/test is what God uses to strengthen my faith, temptations are what the devil uses to weaken our faith. As James 1 puts it, I should consider it pure joy when going through trials of various kinds, because ultimately God is using them to build me up and make me complete and ready for His work. So its not like its my sins or anything I didn’t do that is causing me to go through this. Its like school. I have to be trained and equipped for what’s ahead. So this trials and test are a sign of a new level coming. I feel like saying a hallelujah at this point!

Anyway, in this desert there are some things that I have learnt that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Like depending on God daily. Financially that is. I finished school having never gone broke. Like there is no day I went to school with only fare to and fro like today. Today I was giving my offering thinking that I only have fare to go back to the house. Yet I had plans for tomorrow and deep inside my heart I knew I would go through with them. And God has provided. I haven’t gotten into debt. I don’t think I’m ever going to worry about tomorrow when I lived a day when today was all I wanted God to take me through. 

All in all, I’m glad I know that in this wilderness, God is here with me. Molding me. Its hard, but its the only way to be a hero of faith.